Speak Your Truth: Using “I” Statements and the Broken Record Technique to Set Boundaries with Confidence

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In a world that constantly demands more—more time, more energy, more emotional labour—setting boundaries isn’t selfish. It’s survival. Yet for many of us, expressing our limits feels uncomfortable, even risky. We fear rejection, conflict, or being misunderstood.

But here’s the truth: boundaries are bridges, not walls. They protect your peace while preserving relationships. And with the right tools, you can communicate them with grace and strength.

💬 The Power of “I” Statements: Speak from the Heart

“I” statements are a simple yet transformative way to express your needs without triggering defensiveness. Instead of blaming or accusing, they centre your feelings and experiences.

🔹 Why They Work:

Reduce conflict and emotional reactivity
Promote empathy and understanding
Keep the conversation focused and respectful

🧩 Structure of an “I” Statement:

“I feel [emotion] when [specific situation]. I need [clear request or boundary].”

Example:

“I feel overwhelmed when I’m asked to stay late without notice. I need advance communication to manage my time.”

This approach shifts the tone from confrontation to collaboration. It invites dialogue, not defensiveness.

🔁 The Broken Record Technique: Calm, Clear, Consistent

Sometimes, even the most thoughtful boundary is met with resistance. That’s where the Broken Record technique comes in. It’s a gentle yet firm way to reinforce your boundary—without escalating the situation.

🔹 How It Works:

Repeat your boundary calmly and consistently
Avoid getting pulled into arguments or justifications
Stay grounded in your message

Example:

“I understand you’re frustrated, but I won’t be able to take on that task today.” “I hear you, but I won’t be able to take on that task today.” “As I mentioned, I won’t be able to take on that task today.”

It’s not about being robotic—it’s about being resolute. The repetition reinforces your boundary while keeping the tone respectful.

🌿 Boundaries Without Guilt: Reclaim Your Voice

Setting boundaries isn’t about controlling others—it’s about honouring yourself. When you use “I” statements and the Broken Record technique together, you create a powerful communication style that’s assertive, compassionate, and clear.

You’re not responsible for others’ reactions—but you are responsible for your truth. And when you speak it with kindness and consistency, you give others permission to do the same.

💡 Final Thoughts on Boundaries: You Deserve to Be Heard

Boundaries are an act of self-love. They say, “I matter.” They say, “My needs are valid.” And they say, “I can care for you without abandoning myself.”

So the next time you feel that inner tug—that quiet discomfort—pause. Breathe. And speak your truth. You don’t have to shout. You just have to stand firm.

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About me

Steven Lucas MBACP PNCPS (Accred) is a professional counselling psychotherapist working in Northamptonshire. Read Full Bio.

On a Personal Note:

This blog is more than words—it’s my way of creating a life of meaning, purpose, and support for the people I love most: my family.

After years of navigating life’s emotional highs and lows, I realised that what people crave isn’t just information—they want belonging, encouragement, and heart. That’s what I set out to share here.

Every post is crafted with intention: to inspire, to uplift, and to offer real hope. Whether you’re struggling with mental wellbeing, searching for personal growth, or simply looking to feel less alone in a busy world, you’re in the right place.

What drives me? The Lord and my family, and the belief that with empathy and authentic connection, we can build a better world—one reader at a time. Thanks for being here. You’re not just a visitor—you’re part of this journey.

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Healing isn’t linear, and emotional wellbeing isn’t a destination—it’s a relationship we build with ourselves over time. I’ve shared a piece of my journey here, but I know every path looks different. What’s helped you feel more grounded or whole lately? Whether it’s a small ritual, a big breakthrough, or even a question you’re still sitting with—I’d love to hear it. Your story might be exactly what someone else needs to read today.

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Disclaimer:

I am not a doctor so this guide should not be considered a replacement for seeking medical advice. It is also not a substitute for obtaining therapy as other factors, such as trauma, need to be considered.

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